Invisible Man In my defence, Officer… everyone else was doing it

Mr Lehrer’s muse is not fettered by such inhibiting factors as taste

So I really like Tom Lehrer’s music. It’s hilarious. Unfortunately, a lot of it is a lot more relevant to the time in which it was written – it’s still funny, but I imagine it’s lost a bit of bite. Poisoning Pigeons in the Park is pretty timeless though, if you want to know what I’m on about.

Even better than his music, sometimes, are the introductions he gives for each song before performing – partly explaining the context, partly just another medium for dropping in a punch line. They’re deliciously dry and witty, making for some nice quotes.

I feel that if a person cannot communicate, the very least he can do is to shut up.

The last part of this is completely irrelevant… as was the whole thing, I suppose, except that it provides me with an introduction for this post.

^^That was a paraphrase of the end of one of his introductions, so this all works out very nicely in my head. Nobody else will get the reference, so I’ve pretty much written this to please myself. I’m rambling. I basically have a few vague thoughts I wanted to commit to the aether.

I don’t always communicate well, and I tend to take Mr Lehrer’s advice. Probably too much. I spend time in my own head instead of saying or doing something. Except when I’ve had some beer. Or I’m on the Internet. Or both, as is the current situation.

I like walking in the rain. I think I like walking after the rain, at night, even more. It’s really quiet, and everything has a slightly different texture. It’s a fun time to be alone with my thoughts.

I have many thoughts and dreams, but I think I’m holding on to them too closely. Or rather, sometimes I’m a little scared that if I pursue an opportunity, it will either fail or not live up to my hopes. That’s pretty silly, but I think it anyway. What is life without chance?

It makes the whole world a touch more palatable to think of everything as a game. It’s a pretty handy metaphor, but sometimes I think it’s really shallow, and other times it seems pretty deep. The princess is in another castle, but I’m leveling up.

I haven’t used the word distraction for a while, but it’s back in my vocabulary. 

I’m failing this at the moment, but maybe I stayed out long enough.

I’ve got a question on my mind, but I don’t know how to ask it. It’s only got two answers, but I’m kinda scared of both.

I should probably be more direct, but then this show would have a different name, wouldn’t it?

Feeling good

It’s true.

Feeling really good, actually.  Work is not bad at all, for the moment. It will suck when I have to get around to writing those silly reports for uni, but the degree of apathy I hold for those subjects is at a record high.

I got a big green envelope from IBM containing the offer they promised me a month ago. It’s nice to have something solid, but it also makes my impending corporate servitude seem a little too real. I want to be at uni forever!
Optiver would also like to talk to me, but not til June 10. It would be nice to make a choice, but I should really just be grateful to have an offer at all.

Even the body feels good.  Two gym sessions and suddenly my favourite jeans fit? I didn’t even know I had favourite jeans. I wonder why I even stopped going. No, scratch that. I know why I stopped. I also know why I started again. Exercise is actually ok. A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do… so they say.

C++ (i.e. my sole actual subject) is a load of fun. On Monday, we had our customary pre-match warmup before deciding that it probably wasn’t a revision lecture, spent less than half an hour in the lab doing the week’s exercise, ate at the Landsdowne and then played Xbox with much drinking. 

Ok, I did the much drinking. But it’s too hard to take home! And six packs are the best value. And Hoegaarden is the greatest. And my friends are awesome.

There may be something else which is making me feel good, but I don’t want to jinx it.

Speaking of Hoegaarden, I think I still owe someone an introduction. I would like that.

p.s. this post and the last have a micro theme/easter egg. Small, but there.

I need to get out of my head

…it’s too crowded in here.

I’m not sure exactly what my point is – I guess that is the point. Sometimes I have no idea at all what goes on in my head. Sometimes I know exactly what goes on in my head, and it surprises me.

I don’t think that was actually my point, to be honest. With rather remarkable timing, my cat has wandered in, settled on the floor, and told me the answer. (Metaphorically, of course. I might be insane, but I’m not crazy). 

I need to be more cat like.

I overthink things. Here I should probably point out that things is in fact a euphemism, but I’m not going to expand on it’s precise meaning. I need to leave a little intrigue… plus, I don’t think I could define what I mean anyway. Not at the moment.  

So, overthinking. It’s not good. I’m pretty sure it’s never been beneficial. I ascribe meaning to the smallest things, I look for details where there are none, I assume intent behind random events. I do a bunch of things in my head, totally ignoring the fact that I have fuck all to base anything on.

It doesn’t work. I get way, way ahead of myself and end up thoroughly consumed. Maybe I try to make something of nothing. Maybe I’ve taken something and turned it into nothing. I spend too much time in my head, instead of chilling out and taking things as they come.  Hence, being more cat like.

I think that’s near enough to what I meant. Issue identified. I guess it remains to be seen whether or not I can follow my own advice.

I’d surely like to.